Tuesday, February 15, 2011

To All the Concerts I Loved Before - Part 11

Damn.  Almost near the end of this lengthy Donist World concert history extravaganza.  I'm guessing about one or two more entries after this then I will have to delve into something else.  Maybe the intricacies of competitive goat herding, the heated debates surrounding alternative shoe-tying techniques and reported sharktopus sightings.  The sky's the limit here at Donist World and we're here to bring my mom and my best friends' dog the news they want, when they want it.

*I'm still floored sick, so let's hope I make sense...hell, the illness will probably have the unintended effect of making my writing better than usual; here's to hoping.

Brazilian Girls at The Fillmore, July 9, 2005 - Amy and I went to this concert that just happened to coincide with our in state vacation of traveling up the California coast for ten days and staying in places like Santa Cruz, Monterey and Big Sur.  The Brazilian Girls were gaining a lot of attention around this time and after my brother and my failed attempt to see them in Santa Monica earlier that year I was proactive and bought the tickets in advance after a search on a whim for concerts during our vacation.
We were joined by Amy's good friend, Tara, who I adore, and we bought our drinks and set in for a great show.  The girls were more interested in catching up than watching the band so they went to the balcony area and I stayed on the packed floor for a great, although, short performance.  I can't really complain about the length of the show as they were touring for their eponymous debut album Brazilian Girls.  They performed great dance numbers and the crowd loved them as did I.  Overall a very fun show.

Hot Hot Heat at the Ventura Theatre, July 30, 2005 - I went to this show for Amy's sake and although I was not overly familiar with the band, Hot Hot Heat kicked out an energetic set in support of their Elevator album.  My main problem was that the sound system sucked ass and was crackling, popping and buzzing for the entire set.  Again, a good show, and not my usual cup of tea, but then again I won't skip the album when it pops up on shuffle in iTunes.

Bright Eyes at the Santa Barbara Bowl, October 22, 2005 - Okay, I realize that I might be putting my life in jeopardy by enraging young girls that love this guy with what I'm about to say.  I do not enjoy Bright Eyes.  There, I said it.  Maybe that's a little bit harsh.  I like some Bright Eyes music, but most of it is not for me.  Maybe it's the vocal style or the majority of the songs themselves, but again it's just not for me.  My wife and all of our friends who went to the show disagree with me on this point.
Something I should point out to those unfamiliar with the Santa Barbara Bowl is that it is an open air venue and all the shows are "Rain or Shine."  As luck would have it, it was fucking freezing and drizzling throughout the night, but that was not my main complaint.  *Hold on a second, let me make sure the rabid teenage girls are not lurking outside yet...Okay, we're clear*  The biggest problem was the god damn teens screaming their bloody guts out for the entire show.  "I love you Connor...AAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!" is what I heard the entire time even though Mr. Oberst had the damn amps cranked to eleven.  The girls wailed the lyrics at the tops of their lungs and just screamed through much of the honestly great set.  If only Oberst knew that he could have commanded the throngs of teens to take to the streets and pillage and burn Santa Barbara in his name.  It would probably go a little something like this:
"I...I...I...hello, Santa Barbara."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH."
"Um...yeah...umm."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHH.  I LOVE YOU CONNOR!"
"Um...I...I...I...I am happy to be here..."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHH.  I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BABY, CONNOR!!!"
"Th-thank you very much.  Um...I...I have a request.  Would you like to hear it?"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
"Oh.  Th-that's nice.  Um...I could really use some economy destroying gold bullion from your banks downtown.  Would you be so...um...nice as to...g-get some for me.  If...if you do, I'll write a song just especially for you.  P-please."
"AAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!
If he had done this, the Bowl would have emptied out and within an hour Santa Barbara would have been burning and Bright Eyes himself would need an extra trailer to haul away all of his gold.
Joking aside, it was a good show and would have been better if the teens would have kept their yappers shut long enough to actually hear the songs.  The performance, however, did not have the perception-changing effect that Built to Spill had on me, but I definitely have a respect for the man and the band, even if the music is not my favorite.

Oh shit...did you hear that?  It's the teens.  They've already heard that I have insulted their god.  I...I got to get out of here.  Oh no.  They have the joint surrounded.  You'll never take me alive teenage girls!  NEVER!  ...huh...not all of you are teenagers anymore.  Makes sense since the show was five and a half years ago, so I'll just apologize and be on my way...  Wait, you're an attorney now and you're still mad that I don't like Bright Eyes?  Put the pitchforks and torches down...please...

Now, at least I didn't knock Mr. Justin Biebs, even I am not that crazy.  Although I will say that I am proud to be a non-Beleeber and think that the only good Biebs song is the one that was slowed down 200x.  Oh no, now I've offended the pre-teens.  RUN!

More next time.
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